I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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