I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
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all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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