i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Randomize