call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
there is puke in my bra ... again
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize