Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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