Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize