So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize