The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize