There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize