Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
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