I'm laying in your front yard are you home
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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