I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
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Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
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I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
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