I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize