He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize