I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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