Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize