My hair reeks of homosexuality.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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