Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize