I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize