id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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