She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
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