I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize