Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize