Life is so much better after having sex.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
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we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
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This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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