I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Randomize