I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize