remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize