I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Randomize