wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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