I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
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It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
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I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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