I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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