is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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