it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize