Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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