he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
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