Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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