how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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