trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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