I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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