it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize