I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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