I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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