margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize