And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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