she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize