That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize