So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize