You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize