Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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