i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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